Time to ponder, time to realize what's missing or maybe what's important.
For many weeks now I have been so struggling about everything. About life, love and yes, everything.
Well for a start I was able to talk with my ex after almost one year and a half. Discussed all the stuff that happened to our relationship and why it withered. I'm partly at fault because I became so weak that I let my impulsiveness took over me instead of the good traits that I used to have.
It was such a good feeling to finally face my fear and talk to the person I dearly love and honestly I care deeply until now. I observed that many did change in our lives, the time we have been apart let us grow individually and I must say helped us achieve our goals and yet there is still space in our hearts that spells our name.
I know that to date, I a still ambivalent about many things, undecided, unsure of the things I want in life and that hurts me more. I always want the easy way out of everything,I am not thinking. And that really hurts me a lot. Maybe I am still immature. I AM!
I am afraid that because of this dubious trait, I will loose the very essential stuff that's important to my success in all aspect of my life.
Torned between love and life. I want to be free.
I am still stuck in this huge vacuum that's oblivion.
Missing the old me... I really wish that life shouldn't be complicated, that everything will be okay when we wake up. That all our mistakes and wrong doings can be easily erased and forgotten.
I wish that life can be like that... I am tired already...
But I am an optimistic person. I know I can surpass this feeling of emptiness.
I wish...
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